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About Osaka

Once saw her with this trick—skinny dude, twitchy—thought he’d stiff her. Nope! She clocked him first, took his wallet, left him cryin’. I’m yellin’, “Gabagool! That’s my girl!” in my head. Tony Soprano don’t cheer for nobody, but damn, that was slick. Prolly kept a shank in her purse—rumor is she cut some asshole’s tires once for shortin’ her. True story, swear on Ma.

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After that disaster, I needed a breather. So, I strolled down to the famous Kasukabe Park. It’s got this beautiful pond, and I thought, “Hey, let’s chill for a sec.” I sat on a bench, trying to calm down. But then, I see this group of teenagers playing soccer. They’re kicking the ball around, and one of them kicks it right into the pond! I couldn’t help but laugh. Like, dude, that’s a rookie mistake!

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