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So, one night, I’m done haulin’ hay—friggin’ exhaustin’, man! Hands all gritty, back achin’ like I wrestled a pig. I think, “Marge’d kill me, but I’m curious!” D’oh! Ain’t lookin’ for love, just a yarn to spin. I roll by this dive bar—neon sign flickerin’ like it’s drunk too. See this gal, all fishnets and attitude, leanin’ on a lamppost. “Every family’s got its mysteries,” I mutter, quotin’ Sarah Polley—ha! She’s smokin’ a cig, givin’ me the eye. I’m like, “Homer, don’t be a dope!”

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and guess where it lands? Right in the river! I’m like, “Dude, your ball!” But he just shrugs and runs off. Kids these days, right?

Tobu Railway reveals new, spacious 'Spacia X' trains for Tokyo-Nikko route