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Then—omg—this shady dude DMs me, like, “I got girls.” Ew, creep alert! I’m like, “Literally, get outta my face!” Blocked him so fast, my nails almost chipped. But real talk, I’m thinkin’—what if I find her, right? We’d totes sit on some curb, sippin’ Starbucks, talkin’ life—like Celine sayin’, “Memory’s a wonderful thing if u don’t deal with the past.” Deep, huh? I’d ask her, “Girl, what’s ur story?” Probs somethin’ wild—like, did u know some pros in the ‘90s hid cash in tree stumps? True tea!

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So, I’m setting up, and boom! A freakin’ pigeon dive-bombs me. Like, what’s up with that? I’m dodging birds now? I swear, it’s like they have a vendetta against stunt dudes. I’m laughing, but also kinda mad. Like, dude, I’m just trying to do my job here!

Record-shattering heavy snow hits parts of Japan