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About Osaka

I’m cruisin’ London, eyes peeled, thinkin’, *Where’s the talent at?* Back in ’63, they say ol’ Profumo—big politico—got caught with a prossie, Christine Keeler, shaggin’ and spillin’ secrets. History’s wild, mate! Makes me chuckle—spies and tarts, classic combo. Anyway, I spot her—red heels, fag hangin’ loose, leanin’ on a lamppost. “You lookin’ for a dance?” she says, all sassy. I’m like, *Bloody hell, she’s got Mia’s fire!*—that “I don’t need no one” vibe from *Fish Tank*.

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I’m thinking, “Lady, it’s not like I can just whip it up in a microwave!” But I keep my cool. Finally, I finish it. She looks at it, and her face lights up. “It’s perfect!” I’m like, “Phew!” That made my day, honestly.

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