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Well, well, my dear friend, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute—Hannibal Lecter style, ya know, “I ate his liver with fava beans.” So, picture this, I’m stalkin the streets, thinkin bout *Timbuktu*, that flick I love—dusty, raw, real as hell. “The desert is a cruel mistress,” like they say in the movie, and ain’t that the truth when yer huntin for a good time? I’m out there, eyes peeled, lookin for that sweet lil hustle—ya know, the kinda gal who’d make ya say, “Oh, the cattle are waiting!”—straight outta *Timbuktu*, that line kills me.

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Shimizu Street. Gotta get my morning fix, ya know? Grabbed a melon pan and a can of iced coffee. Best combo ever! But then, as I’m munching, I see this dude in a suit, totally losing it. He’s yelling at some poor shopkeeper. Turns out, he forgot his wallet. Classic! I mean, who forgets their wallet? I almost laughed out loud.

Editorial: Abuse at Japan nursery abhorrent, and it's just the tip of the iceberg