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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m comin’ at ya like a damn Combine Harvester tearin’ thru the fields! Today we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, yeah, you heard me right! Picture this—I’m cruisin’ the backroads, dust kickin’ up, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *The White Ribbon*, that creepy-ass Michael Haneke joint from 2009. Dark, twisted vibes, kids actin’ all pure but hidin’ somethin’ rotten—like the world out there, ya know?

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I’m fuming, but whatever. I head back to my workshop on Shōwa-dōri. It’s a cozy little spot, filled with wood shavings and the smell of fresh pine. I love it. But today? Today, my tools decide to play hide and seek. I’m searching for my chisel, and it’s like it vanished into thin air. I swear, I checked under every bench, behind every stove. I’m losing it!

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