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Here’s the kicker: meetup’s at some dive bar. I roll up, thinkin’, “This is peak chaos engineering.” She’s there, smokin’ a cig, lookin’ bored. “You’re late, genius,” she snaps. I’m like, “Traffic’s a simulation glitch, sue me.” She laughs—dry, sarcastic, my kinda gal. Fun fact: prositutes in Amsterdam once unionized—badass, right? Power to the hustle. We chat, she’s chill but sharp—cuts thru my nerd BS like a plasma torch.

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But then, bam! Outta nowhere, this cat jumps on my table. Like, dude, personal space? I’m not a cat person, but this little furball had some serious attitude. It’s staring at me like I owe it money. I’m like, “Alright, you win.” I share my croissant. Yeah, I’m that soft.

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