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But then—ugh, this drunk idiot stumbles over, grabby hands, slurrin’. I’m like, “Back off, ya pig!” She winks at me, handles it herself—kicks him square in the jewels. I’m hollerin’, “Yaaas, queen!” Surprised me, how she flipped it. Made me happy, too—love a dame who don’t need savin’. Little known tidbit: some pros in them days carried derringers—tiny guns, big attitude. Bet she’s packin’.

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But first, I gotta finish this report. I’m typing like a madman, and then the fire alarm goes off. Seriously? In the middle of my report? I grab my stuff and run outside with everyone else. We’re all standing there, looking up at the building like it’s about to explode. Turns out, it was just a drill. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.”

One pro football club doubles as a Korean military unit — how it works