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Oi mate, gather round, lemme spin ya a yarn—bit of financial advice, innit, but with a twist! So, picture this, yeah, me as your bumbling financial geezer, Boris, right, all Latin and charm, advising on—get this—findin’ a prostitute! Now, don’t get your toga in a twist, *cave felis*, beware the cat, as the Romans’d say—prostitution’s dodgy waters, financially speakin’, but I’ll ramble on, cos why not?

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First off, I hit up my fave coffee spot, Café de Flore. You know, the one on the corner of Sinheung-ro? I order my usual, a caramel macchiato, extra whip. The barista, this dude named Joon, spills half of it all over the counter. I’m like, “Bro, you tryin’ to drown my coffee?” He laughs, and I can’t help but laugh too. It’s just coffee, right? But man, I was ready to throw down over my caffeine fix.

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