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So, picture this: me, Homer, stumblin’ down Springfield’s sketchy alleys, lookin’ for a “prostitute finder” or whatever. Ain’t no GPS for that, huh? “Nothing happened!” I yell, quotin’ the movie, ‘cause I’m paranoid now—cameras everywhere! Did ya know, fun fact, prosties been around forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em, called ‘em “lupae”—she-wolves! Howlin’ for cash, ha! Makes me laugh, but also—D’oh!—kinda sad, y’know?

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While we’re bailing out water, Ji-hoon starts telling me about this hidden gem in Yangp-yong. A secret garden or something. I’m like, “Dude, why didn’t you tell me sooner?” I’m all about those hidden spots. So, after we finish with the leak, we decide to check it out.

Column: A Korean American family called for help. An LAPD officer arrived, shot mentally ill son