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About Ahmadi

Alright, listen up, ya knuckleheads! I’m an actuary in Russia, crunchin’ numbers like a boss, but lemme tell ya bout somethin’ wild—findin’ a prostitute ‘round here. It’s like huntin’ for bin Laden in *Zero Dark Thirty*, ya know? “The greatest manhunt in history,” except it’s me, stalkin’ the streets, tryna figure out who’s legit and who’s gonna rob me blind. Don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s rainin’—I ain’t that dumb!

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But then, BAM! I get a message. The challenger’s here. My heart’s racin’. I rush to the arena, and it’s packed. The crowd’s goin’ wild. I step into the ring, and there he is. This dude’s huge! Like, he’s been liftin’ weights since birth or somethin’. I’m thinkin’, “What did I get myself into?”

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