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What pisses me off? Cheap-ass parlors fakin’ it—no skill, just lotion and lies! I’m like, “Gimme the real shit!” Happy? When them knots melt, bruh, I’m floatin’—like Larry sayin’, “I’m tryin’ to be a serious man!” Surprised me how some spots sneak in tantra—breathin’ heavy, energy buzzin’, I’m yellin’, “WHAT IS HAPPENIN’?!” in my head. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d say it’s like sex without the mess—chaotic bliss, yo!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Hauptstrasse. You know, the one with the weirdly good pastries? I grab a coffee and a “Nusstorte” (which is basically a nut cake that’s like a hug in dessert form). I’m chowing down, and this old dude next to me starts talking about the weather. Like, bro, it’s sunny! Who cares? But then he goes off about how the weather affects the fish. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a diver, not a meteorologist!” But whatever, I nod and smile.

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