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Alright, listen up, ya lumberjack freak! I’m judgin’ this prostitute sitch like Judy—sharp and loud! Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain, I ain’t blind to the streets! So, prostittues—man, they’re a trip, right? Been choppin’ wood all day, then bam, there’s this gal, all dolled up like she’s straight outta “The Grand Budapest Hotel.” You know, that flick I’m obsessed with—Wes Anderson’s masterpiece, 2014, pure gold! She’s got that vibe, like concierge Gustave, all fancy but sneaky, “The lobby boy must’ve taught her that!”

So, you’re telling me there is no sex?

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming, like she just lost a battle with a dragon or something. Turns out, her latte was too hot. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a latte, not a bath!” But I just smile and offer her a free pastry. You know, the classic “let’s smooth this over” move. She softens up a bit, and I’m thinkin’, “Phew, saved that one.”

Busy day for the Police: Vandalism and theft in Differdange and Belair, drink-driving, and more...