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We chat, she’s tellin me prices – 50 bucks, quick gig. I’m thinkin, “Life’s too short to be appropriate,” another *Toni Erdmann* gem. So I’m in, but it’s weird, y’know? Not the sex part – that’s whatever – but the whole deal. She’s human, not some movie prop. Surprised me how chill she was, like we’re buddies. “You’re naked under there,” I tease, quotin the flick again. She smirks, “Duh, genius.”

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Then, during lunch, I decide to take a stroll down Daugavas iela. The river looks beautiful today. I swear, the sun was shining just right. I even saw some kids playing by the water. Made me smile, ya know? But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and almost takes my sandwich! Like, dude, back off! I’m not sharing my lunch with you!

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