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So, I swagger up, all charm, “What’s yer price, love?” She laughs—proper cackle—says, “More’n you got, trickster.” Cheeky! I’m half mad, half lovin’ it—nobody talks to *me* like that. Didja know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy, eh? Makes it sound poetic, not dodgy. Anyway, she’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “This is my glorious purpose tonight!”—bit dramatic, sure, but I’m Loki, I live for it.

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After what feels like forever, the internet’s back. I’m finally catching up on everything. And then, I get a call from my boss. “We need you to present at the conference next week.” I’m like, “What? I can barely handle today!” But I can’t say no. So, I’m stuck prepping for that now.

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