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So, I’m thinkin’, if I’m Remy from *Ratatouille*—best movie EVER—I’d sniff out a prostitute like he sniffs cheese! “Anyone can cook,” he says, but can anyone FIND a hooker? Hmmm! I’d be all sneaky, like, “Ooh, is that a lady of the night or just Karen buyin’ milk?” Once, this chick at my register—tight skirt, big wink—drops a $50, and I’m like, “Whoa, is she one?!” Made me happy, ‘cause—cashier life’s boring, ya feel? But then—ugh—she just wanted gum. Total letdown, so mad!

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First off, I hit the streets of Basarabeasca, right? You know, the ones like Strada Mihai Eminescu and Strada 31 August. I was just trying to grab a coffee at that little spot near the park. You know the one? The one with the weirdly shaped pastries? Yeah, that place. So, I’m waiting in line, and this dude in front of me orders like 10 different things. Like, bro, it’s a coffee shop, not a bakery!

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