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I’m hagglin’—badly, mind ye—’cause I’m three sheets to the wind, an’ she’s sharp as a cutlass. “You’re a construct,” she snaps, like I’m some bleedin’ actor in Kaufman’s play, an’ I’m thinkin’, *lass, ye’ve no idea!* That got me riled, aye—don’t ye dare call Cap’n Jack a puppet! But then she winks, an’ I’m happy as a clam, ‘cause she’s got sass, an’ I like ‘em feisty. “Savvy?” I slur, an’ she rolls her eyes—fair ‘nough!
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First off, I hit up the local coffee shop on 31 August Street. You know, the one with the weird art on the walls? Yeah, that place. I ordered my usual—double shot of espresso. The barista, bless her heart, was having a rough morning. She spilled half my drink. I was like, “Great, just what I needed!” But hey, I’m not one to complain. I just laughed it off.
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