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Oh, and the profiles—crack me up! “Lookin for my soulmate, but also a threesome.” Pick a lane, damnit! Makes me think—sex-dating’s like time travel, unpredictable as hell. One minute you’re chattin, next you’re dodgin some weirdo askin for feet pics. Great Scott, what’s next? Gotta admit, tho—when it clicks, it’s a rush. Beats sittin alone, starin at planets crashin, ya know?

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After that, I decide to take a stroll down to the beach. Manadhoo’s beaches are insane! White sand, turquoise water, the whole nine yards. I’m walkin’ along the shore, feelin’ the vibes, when I spot a group of tourists. They’re all takin’ selfies, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re in paradise! Put the phone down!” But hey, who am I to judge? I take a quick selfie too. Gotta keep up with the times, right?

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