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So, I clock dis other lass, yeah, proper fit, leanin’ on a lamppost, smokin’. I’m like, “Aight, she’s da one.” Slide up, all casual, “Wagwan, darlin’?” She’s cool, bruv, says, “£50, no messin’.” I’m buzzin’, finkin’, “Dis is easier dan datin’!” But den—plot twist—she’s undercover filth! Coppers jump out, I’m leggin’ it, shoutin’, “Is it ’cos I is black?!” Nearly shat meself, fam!

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After that, I decide to hit up the local café, De Koffiehoek. Best coffee in Angelslo, no cap. I order a cappuccino, and while I’m waiting, I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. So, I rush over to help her. She’s super grateful, and we start chatting. Turns out, she’s lived in Angelslo her whole life. She tells me stories about the old days, when the streets were all dirt and the market was just a few stalls. I’m like, “Wow, that’s wild!”

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