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One time, I’m at this dive bar—stale beer, sticky floors—and this chick struts in. Legs for days, man! I’m thinkin’, “She’s gotta be one.” Turns out, she was! Made me happy as a pig in mud, ‘cause I called it. But then—get this—she tries chargin’ me double! I’m like, “What in tarnation? I ain’t no cash cow!” Made me madder’n a wet hen. Reminds me of that line, “You don’t know who I am!”—straight outta the movie. I ain’t no pushover, lady!

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I rolled outta bed, grabbed my coffee from that little café on de Laan, you know the one? The one with the weirdly shaped croissants? Yeah, that place. I swear, they put crack in those things. Anyway, I’m chugging my coffee, and I’m already feelin’ the buzz. I head out to the job site on de Zandweg.

Flower Parade of Bollenstreek held in Bennebroek, Netherlands