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Still, I’m chuffed when it works out. Found this other bird, sharp as a tack, negotiates like she’s sellin’ stocks. “How much?” I ask. She smirks, “More than your Aston Martin, babe.” Cheeky! Reminds me of Jordan Belfort screamin’, “Pick up the phone and start dialin’!”—she’s dialin’ my number, alright. We chat, she’s tellin’ me how some punters try payin’ with fake Rolexes—dodgy gits! Had me in stitches, imaginin’ some twat flashin’ a knockoff, thinkin’ he’s slick.

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Finally, I get to the library, and it’s packed. I’m talking full-on chaos. Kids everywhere, parents trying to shush them, and I’m just standing there like, “What do I do?” I love my job, but some days, it’s like herding cats. And don’t even get me started on the noise. I mean, it’s a library, not a concert hall, right?

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