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About Almere

So, sex-dating—man, it’s a jungle. Apps like Grindr, Bumble, whatever, they’re all the same. People actin’ all hot n’ heavy, droppin’ lines like, “Wanna Netflix n’ chill?” Yeah, okay, buddy, chill with what—your crusty socks? I tried it once—swear to God, chick said she’s “adventurous,” code for “I’ll ghost ya after one drink.” Infuriating! Wasted my damn time. Coulda been watchin’ *Spotlight* again, gettin’ mad at the world instead of some flake. “You can’t handle the truth!”—damn right, ‘cause it’s buried under filters and fake moans.

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www.facebook.com will allow you to view the massage parlors in your area. Most actual websites for ordering one up have been taken down lately. That’s your best bet. Willing to bet if you fire up .

We’re laughing, joking, and then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off! Everyone’s freaking out, and I’m just standing there, beer in hand, like, “Is this for real?” Turns out, it was a false alarm. Phew! But the vibe is ruined. People start leaving, and I’m like, “C’mon, we were just getting started!”

Woman forced to spend 22 hours a day in bed due to rare condition