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So, check it – yer lookin’ fer a prossie, an’ it ain’t all glamour. “What’s my name?” she’d say, like Rita in the flick, all mysterious. Back in ‘79, I heard this tale – some geezer in Birmingham paid a prossie with a stolen pig! True story, mate, fuckin’ mental. Made me laugh my arse off, still does. Pigs fer pussy, what a world!

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While I’m waiting, I start people-watching. There’s this old dude on the corner of Kerkstraat, feeding pigeons. I swear, those birds are like his best friends. He’s chatting away, and I’m just thinking, “Man, I need that kind of chill in my life.”

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