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But here’s the thing—*Talk to Her* vibes hit me hard. That line, “The best thing is to wait,” pops up, and I’m like, wait for what? Love? A discount? I’m pacin’, neurotic as hell, thinkin’—is this moral? Immoral? Who cares! I’m not hurtin’ nobody, right? Still, my brain’s yellin’, “Larry, you idiot, don’t do it!” But then—surprise, surprise—I’m curious. What’s she like? Does she talk? Does she laugh at my dumb jokes? I’d probably overthink it, ruin the whole thing. “So, uh, ya like Seinfeld?” Crickets.

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I’m fumin’ now. I mean, I’m a forester, not a coffee target! But then, the kid runs over, all apologetic, and I can’t help but laugh. He’s like, “Sorry, mister!” with this big ol’ grin. I’m like, “No worries, champ. Just add it to my laundry bill.”

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