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Yo, what’s good, fam? So, findin’ a prostitute—wild shit, right? I’m out here, Eric Andre style, chaotic as fuck, screamin’ “Laissez les bons temps rouler!” like Amélie’s pops with his gnome. Picture this: me, stumblin’ thru the streets, lookin’ for that paid love vibe—absurdity’s my fuel, yo! I’m thinkin’, why’s this so damn tricky? Like, Amélie’s got her quirky lil missions, helpin’ folks, and I’m over here tryna dodge sketchy pimps and fake-ass ads.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes up to me. She’s got this wild hair, like a bird’s nest. She starts telling me about her cat, Momo. I’m like, “Lady, I’m just trying to build a shelf here.” But she goes on and on. I mean, I love cats, but c’mon!

"I couldn't handle that stress" - Thomas De Gendt on why he didn't continue as GC rider after podium at the 2012 Giro d'Italia