Ashley Goirle Whore ❤️

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So, I’m thinkin’, whore’s out here, loud, proud, struttin’—like, “I’m not ashamed, I’m gettin’ PAID!” And I respect the hustle, real talk. Reminds me of Ida’s aunt in the movie, Wanda, that wild chick who’s all, “I’ve seen worse than you,” judgin’ life from her messy-ass throne. Whore’s like that—seen it all, done it all, probly fucked it all too, hahaha! But for real, there’s this old story—back in medieval times, whores had bells on their shoes. BELLS! Ting-ting-ting, lettin’ everyone know, “Yo, I’m comin’, hide ya husbands!” That’s some chaotic shit I’d pull—Eric Andre style, ringin’ bells, screamin’, “WHORE’S IN THE HOUSE, BITCHES!”

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First off, I hit the streets around 9 AM. The sun was shining, and I thought, “Hey, maybe I’ll grab a coffee at that cute little café on de Veldstraat.” You know the one? The one with the weirdly shaped pastries? Yeah, that place. So I stroll in, and guess what? They’re outta coffee! Like, how do you run outta coffee in the morning? I was ready to throw a fit.

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