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About Rotterdam

Milkin’ machines, steady they hum, but this? Chaos, it is! Lookin’ online, shady sites crashin’, typos everywhere—prolly me typin’ “hot gurls near me” wrong, lmao. Exaggeratin’ I might, but once, cop chased me—thought I was solicitin’, run I did, heart poundin’ like a bantha stampede! “Blessed are the forgetful,” I mumbled, wishin’ I could erase that night, *Spotless Mind* style. Quirky thought, hmm—wonder if she’d milk a cow? Bet she’d laugh, callin’ me “green weirdo.”

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First stop, I’m at the Vischmarkt. It’s this cute lil’ fish market, and I’m all about that fresh seafood life. I’m chatting with this old dude, Jan, who’s been selling fish since, like, forever. He’s got stories, man. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches a herring right outta my hand! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” Jan’s cracking up, and I’m just mad. Like, who knew seagulls were such thieves?

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