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So, I dig a lil—turns out, back in the day, prostitutes in Hong Kong—like Wong Kar-wai’s turf—had these wild secret codes. Hand signals, hairpins, the works. Sneaky af! Blew my mind. Imagine me, Edna, spotin’ that from my lifeguard tower— “No capes! And no damn hairpins neither!” I’d yell, splashin’ water at ‘em. Hilarious, right?

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But then, I hear this commotion. A bunch of kids are runnin’ around, and one of ‘em trips and falls right in front of me. I rush over, and I’m like, “Hey, you okay?” The kid’s all teary-eyed, but then he starts laughin’. I’m like, “What’s so funny?” He says, “I’m just practicing my fall for the marathon!” I can’t help but laugh. Kids are wild, man.

The Voice coach Ali B. convicted of rape & attempted rape; Two years in prison