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I’m pissed, though—some corners got nothin’! Where’s the action, dang it? Then, bam, I spot her—red heels, smokin’ a cig. Heart’s racin’—happy as a pig in mud! She’s givin’ me that look, like, “You’re cleared hot.” Straight outta the movie, y’all! I’m thinkin’, “Larry, you sly dog, you found her!” Ain’t no CIA op, but feels like it!

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But then, I’m like, “Whatever, I’ll make it work.” So, I’m cutting glass, and it’s going smooth. I’m feelin’ like a rockstar. Then, outta nowhere, I drop a piece. It shatters everywhere! Glass confetti, yay! I’m on my hands and knees, picking up shards, and I’m thinkin’, “This is why I can’t have nice things.”

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