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Listening intently, I am Ruby. I am bubbly in Kudelstaart, and Find A Prostitute is inspiring, you make my pulse quicken, erotic massage and Bondage light up my life! I am a romantic who believes in love letters, mixtapes, and other forms of old-school romance..
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But then—ugh, the cops roll by, lights flashin’. She bolts, I’m left standin’ there like a schmuck. Pissed me off—why they gotta hassle ‘em? Let ‘em work, jeez! I’m mutterin’ to myself, “This is my design,” plottin’ how to find her again. Maybe leave a note—*meet me, bring wine*. Ha! Imagine her face—prossie and a psycho, perfect date.
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Man, what a day! Seriously, Kudelstaart, you’ve outdone yourself. I woke up thinking it’d be just another boring admin day. You know, the usual grind. But nah, the universe had other plans.
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