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About Eindhoven

Me? I’d rather chase snacks than skirts! Prostitution’s legal some places—Nevada, bam! But shady everywhere else. Costs? Like, 50 bucks to thousands—nuts! Depends where ya at. Once heard ‘bout this john—total loser—got robbed blind. Laughed my tail off! “The devil’s work,” movie says—maybe, ha!

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First stop, the local school. I’m a pro at helping students figure out their lives, ya know? But today? Ugh. I walk in, and it’s chaos. Kids everywhere, running around like they just discovered sugar. I’m like, “Yo, chill! We gotta talk about your future!” But they’re too busy arguing about who’s the best Fortnite player. Spoiler: it’s not even close.

DEBORAH A. SEYER