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About Amsterdam

Last week, I’m tailin’ this lead—shady alley, smells like regret. I’m mutterin’, *“Oh, Marge, why this job?”* Suddenly, this gal, she’s standin’ there, all sparkly skirt, eyes like she’s seen too much. I’m thinkin’, *“Her soul’s driftin’ like Boonmee’s jungle spirits!”* I ask her name—Candy, she says. Candy! Ha, like that’s real! I’m all, “Hmm… sugar-coated lies!” Got me chucklin’—these names, always so fake, like Bart’s homework excuses.

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But then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off. Seriously? In the middle of my groove? Everyone’s rushing out, and I’m just standing there, like, “Is this a drill or what?” Turns out, it was just some kid pulling the alarm for fun. I’m like, “Dude, not cool!”

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