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I’m sweatin’, thinkin’, “This shit better be worth it.” Then—BOOM—she appears, legs for days, leanin’ on a wall like she owns the night. “Come closer, I won’t bite,” she says, smirkin’. Reminds me of that *Tropical Malady* dude whisperin’, “I’m waitin’ for you in the dark.” Gives me chills, man! I’m hyped, but also—fuck, is this a setup? Last time, some pimp rolled up, swung a bat—nearly took my damn head off! Learned quick—keep your guard up, motherfucker!

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After that, I head over to the castle, the Duurstede Castle. It’s all medieval and stuff, and I’m feeling like a knight. But then, I see a bunch of kids playing knights too. They’re running around, swords made of foam, and I’m like, “C’mon, kids! I’m the real deal here!” But then one of ‘em challenges me to a duel. I’m like, “Sure, why not?” I go easy on ‘em, but man, they’re relentless! I’m dodging foam swords like I’m in the arena.

Salisbury Cathedral Choir returns from successful Netherlands tour