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About Amsterdam

So I’m stumblin’, lookin’ fer a lass, right? Streets all twisty, dark—like that bit in the movie, “the favela’s a maze, man!” I see this gal, winkin’, smokin’—proper fit, yeah? I go, *mimes walking, trips, waves awkwardly* “Hullooo!” She laughs—bloody hell, I’m red as a lobster! Made me happy, that—silly ol’ me, charmin’ ‘em accidental-like. But then—BAM!—some bloke, her pimp prob’ly, storms up, all “Who’s this prat?!” *mimes dodging a punch, flails* Nearly shat meself!

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After my coffee, I stroll down the Beilerstraat. It’s a nice little shopping area. I pop into a thrift store. You know, just browsing. I find this ridiculous sweater. It’s bright orange with a giant cat on it. I’m like, “I need this in my life.” So, I buy it. Totally worth it.

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