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About Amsterdam

Anyways, lemme tell ya—lookin’ for a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ a pizza. Back in Springfield, I’d be clueless, but here’s the deal: they’re on apps, sites, even X posts! Some use fake pics—catfish city! One time, I read this wild story—dude paid 200 “roses” and got a granny! Swear, I was dyin’—homerun of a scam! “I don’t think we’re in Harvard anymore!”—ha, movie line fits!

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I grab a quick coffee from that little café on de Laan van de Kruidtuin. Best coffee in Benthuizen, no cap. I mean, it’s like liquid gold. I’m chugging it down, and I see this dude drop his sandwich. Like, full-on slow-mo. I’m laughing, but then I feel bad. Poor guy. But hey, it’s just a sandwich, right?

Philip van der Wees appointed Professor of Allied Health Sciences