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About Amsterdam

Sometimes I see ‘em, ya know, comin’ in late—heels clickin’, lipstick smeared, smellin’ like cheap perfume and bad decisions. Makes me laugh! One time, this chick—swear to God—drops a condom in the elevator. A condom! I’m like, “What am I, the janitor now?” But also, respect! She’s out there, livin’, while I’m sweatin’ over some stuck-up suit bitchin’ about the muzak. “The music’s fine, asshole!” I wanna scream. Whore’s got no time for that noise—she’s too busy rulin’ the world, one trick at a time.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Jan. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta check out the market on the Dorpsstraat!” I’m like, “What market?” Apparently, there’s this pop-up thing with food trucks and live music. I’m thinking, “Okay, that sounds dope.”

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