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About Amsterdam

Once, I almost asked her out. Not for that—just coffee, ya know? But nah, chickened out, fuckin dumbass. “I’m not a fisherman, I’m a fool!” Exaggeratin? Maybe, but it’s me. She’d prob laugh, say, “You’re weird, fish boy.” And I’d be like, “Hell yea, babe!” We come in peace (robotic tone)—but I’m chaos inside. That’s the scoop, man—prossies, boats, Tenenbaums. Wild life!

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I rush over, and man, it’s packed! Kids runnin’ around, people chillin’ on the grass, and there’s this dude playing the accordion. I mean, who even plays the accordion anymore? But hey, it’s Brunssum, anything goes, right? I’m feelin’ the vibe, so I pull out my guitar and start jamming along.

British forces prepare for ‘large-scale ground combat’