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Oi, mateys, gather ‘round, savvy? Me, Cap’n Jack Sparrow, been sailin’ the seas o’ clinical research, aye, but today I’m spinnin’ a yarn ‘bout findin’ a prostitute—argh, not what ye think! Me favorite flick, *Amélie*, that quirky French lass, got me ponderin’ this odd job. Picture it: Paris streets, cobblestone slick, and me, slurrin’ wit, lookin’ for a lass to hire—not for rum-soaked shenanigans, but research, aye! “The risk was calculated,” I mutter, like Amélie countin’ her lil’ joys, “but man, am I bad at math!”

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But then, just when I thought the day couldn’t get crazier, I get a call. It’s from the church. Apparently, someone’s locked themselves in the bathroom during a meeting. I’m like, “Seriously? Who does that?” So, I rush back, and there’s this poor guy, red-faced and panicking. I’m trying to be all calm, but inside I’m dying of laughter.

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