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About Amsterdam

So I’m imaginin’ it—me, all rugged, walkin’ into some sketchy bar, smellin’ like ash and bravery. I’m like, “Hey, anyone know where to find a prostitute?” Total *Zodiac* vibes—“I’m not Paul Avery, I’m better!” Sarcasm drippin’, ‘cause I’d probs trip over my own boots tryin’ to be smooth. Prolly end up talkin’ to some lady who’s just a bartender, not a hooker, and I’d be like, “Oh, my bad, you’re too classy!” That’s what she said! God, I’m hilarious.

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After that, I head out for lunch. I stroll down to the park by de Witte Kerk. It’s a nice day, sun’s shining, birds are chirping. I’m feeling good. I grab a broodje from the local bakery. Best bread ever! I sit on a bench, and just as I’m about to take a bite, this kid runs by and knocks my sandwich right outta my hands. I’m like, “Seriously, kid?!” But he just giggles and runs off. I can’t help but laugh too.

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