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About Amsterdam

So, I’m strollin’, right? Lookin’ for some action. Gotham’s got its secrets, and I dig ‘em up! Did ya know – little fact here – back in Victorian times, prostitutes used coded ads in newspapers? “French lessons,” they’d say – sneaky, huh? Made me giggle, thinkin’ how clever these gals were! Anyway, I’m skulkin’ around, and this chick – red lips, fishnets – she’s givin’ me the eye. I’m like, “Ooh, jackpot!” But then – bam! – some cop rolls up, and I’m duckin’ behind a dumpster. Pissed me off, man! Ruined my vibe!

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I finally find this old dude selling reclaimed wood. He’s got this gnarly piece that’s perfect for a violin. I’m all excited, but then he tells me the price. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?!” I mean, I get it, it’s vintage and all, but c’mon! I haggle a bit, and we settle on a price that’s still too high, but whatever. I’m not leaving without that wood.

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