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About Amsterdam

Oi, mortals, it’s me, Loki—smug mischief, “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” here to spill the tea on sexual-massage! Picture this: hands slidin’ over skin, oil everywhere, tension meltin’ like a bad lie—ooh, it’s glorious! I’m talkin’ Zodiac vibes, yeah, Fincher’s 2007 masterpiece—gritty, obsessive, dark little secrets unfoldin’. Sexual-massage is like that cipher, y’know? Layers peelin’ back, mysteries in every rub. “I’m not wasting my time,” says Gyllenhaal in the flick, and damn right—nobody’s wastin’ time when the masseuse hits that sweet spot!

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After that, we decide to walk it off. We stroll down the Selwerderstraat, and I’m just taking it all in. The buildings are kinda cool, but also a bit weird. Like, what’s with the architecture here? It’s like someone threw a bunch of styles in a blender.

How to survive in Groningen: shopping for groceries