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Here’s the kicker: she ain’t just there for cash. She’s got a hustle—sells water and snacks to us firefighters on the sly. Smart, right? I’m yellin’, “You a damn entrepreneur, not a prostitute!” She winks, says, “Little bit of both, sugar.” I was done—DONE! Laughed so hard I nearly peed my fireproof pants. Ain’t that the most Boonmee thing ever? Past lives, present hustles, all tangled up in the woods.

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Map of Gay Cruising Spots in Zeewolde (Flevoland) where you can have NSA sex, hookups and dating with unknown men in public places.

So, I’m grumbling, walking past the Zeewolde marina. It’s kinda pretty, I guess. Boats everywhere, people chilling. But I’m not in the mood for pretty. I’m in the mood for coffee. I need caffeine, like, yesterday. I swing by this little café on de Wetering. The barista? Super chill. I order a cappuccino, and she’s like, “You want extra foam?” I’m like, “Heck yeah!” I mean, who doesn’t love foam?

Fire at Zeewolde riding school; 18 horses killed