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I’d be madder’n a wet hen if some creep tried rippin’ her off. Ain’t right, y’know? These gals got hearts too, even if life’s kicked ‘em square in the teeth. I’d sashay up, all “Honey, you need a hand?”—‘cause I can’t help but meddle. Surprised me how many just wanna talk, spill their guts like I’m their mama. One time, this gal—Lord, she was skinnier’n a rail—tells me she’s savin’ for a bus ticket outta town. “I’m not staying here forever,” she says, echoin’ that movie line, and I near ‘bout cried right there.

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But then, I see a group of guys playin’ beach volleyball. And I’m like, “Oh no, not this.” They’re all lookin’ at me, and I’m thinkin’, “Great, now I gotta show off.” So, I jump in, and let me tell ya, I’m terrible! I’m spikin’ the ball like a madman, but it’s goin’ everywhere except where it should. Everyone’s laughin’, and I’m just rollin’ with it.

Council puts out an alert on the rapid-growing moth plant