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About Wellington

Personal quirk? I’d burn cash just to feel somethin’. Exaggeration? Maybe. But hoarders make me wanna limp harder, cane-smack their skulls. They lie, sayin’ it’s for “emergencies.” Bullshit—emergency’s you dying broke ‘cause you didn’t grow it. Humor? Picture this: granny with a million in jars, dies, cats eat her. True story—well, half-true, I dunno, sounds right.

'Place of the Tall One'

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While I’m working on those relics, I hear a commotion outside. I peek out, and there’s a bunch of kids playing rugby on the street. I mean, c’mon, it’s Cook Street, not a bloody field! I’m half tempted to run out and yell, “Hey, this ain’t the All Blacks practice!” But then I remember I was a kid once too. So, I just shake my head and get back to the shoes.

Howick Local Board weighs in on mayor’s proposals