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Swingin’ surprise—she’s got a heart, man. Saw her slip a fiver to a beggar once. Blew my mind! Thought, “Shagadelic, she’s deep!” Not just a dolly bird, nah. She’s livin’, breathin’—realer than most squares. Favorite bit? Her smirk—pure cheek. Reminds me, “Laughter defies the sandstorm,” from the flick. She’s defyin’ somethin’, alright—maybe the whole bleedin’ world!

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So, I head out to the paddock. It’s on the outskirts, near the old railway line. Beautiful spot, really. But today? Ugh. My sheep are acting like they’ve had too much caffeine. They’re all over the place! I’m chasin’ ‘em around like a headless chook. One of ‘em, I swear, is named Baa-bara. She’s the ringleader. I’m yellin’, “Baa-bara! Get back here!” But she just looks at me like, “Nah, mate. I’m livin’ my best life.”

Police using DNA to identify human remains found near Tokoroa