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Now, here’s a tidbit fer ye – back in ol’ Tortuga, they say prossies’d signal sailors with red lanterns. Little known fact, that! Adds a bit o’ spice to the chase, don’t it? I’m thinkin’, “A man’s gotta rise, like Malik in *A Prophet*,” ye see? “No one gives you power, you take it.” So I flash me gold tooth, wink at her, an’ she’s hooked – or so I reckon.

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Finally, I manage to calm him down. But then, I see my ex, Lisa, walkin’ down the track. Ugh, just my luck! She’s with some dude, and I’m like, “Really? You couldn’t pick a better spot?” I’m tryin’ to focus, but all I can think about is how she dumped me for some guy who wears socks with sandals. Like, come on!

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