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Where d’ya even start? Streets used to be it, back in the 80s, hookers on every corner, fishnets and heels, smokin cheap cigs. Now? It’s all digital, bro – apps, sites, escorts got profiles slicker than my stock portfolio. You swipe, you pick, like orderin takeout. “I want her tonight,” Brandon says in *Shame*, all desperate, voice crackin – that’s the vibe. You’re horny, you’re greedy, you’re scrollin for that perfect lay. Little known fact? Some of these girls, they got regulars who tip em in Bitcoin – fuckin wild, right? Future’s here, man.

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I decide to grab some kumara instead. I mean, it’s not the same, but whatever. As I’m paying, I spot this cute dog. It’s a fluffy golden retriever, and I’m instantly in love. I bend down to pet it, and it jumps on me, all excited. I’m laughing, and the owner’s like, “He’s a bit of a handful.” I’m like, “Aren’t we all?”

Couple replicate European architecture in Pukekohe