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Little fact for ya—didja know Victorian hookers used coded flowers? Red rose meant “I’m game!” Sneaky, huh? Love that cunning! Anyway, I’m hagglin’—she’s askin’ too much, I’m like, “C’mon, I ain’t Bruce Wayne!” She laughs, I laugh—manic, loud—hehehe! “What’s your damage?” she says. “Life, babe,” I wink, quotin’ Monty’s mirror rant: “No one’s clean.”

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First off, I hit up ul. Wrocławska for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m talking about that little café, “Kawa na Wschód.” Best espresso in town! But guess what? They ran out of my fave blend. Like, are you kidding me? I was ready to throw a fit. I mean, how do you run out of coffee? It’s like a bakery running out of bread! Ugh.