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I ain’t judgin’—live and let live, right? But I was surprised, dude! She told me she’s got regulars—like, what?! One guy brings her coffee every Tuesday! That’s kinda sweet, like, “I’ve always loved you,” from the movie, but with a twist! I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “Patrick, you’re too dumb for this!” Maybe I should sell her insurance—ha! “Prostitute insurance,” I’d call it—covers heels breakin’ and bad dates! LOL, imagine that pitch!

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Finally, I get to the meeting, and it’s a total circus. Everyone’s yelling about the potholes. Like, dude, we all know they’re bad. I mean, I could lose a tire just driving down ul. Traugutta. It’s like a game of dodgeball with the potholes. I’m sitting there, trying to mediate, but my patience is wearing thin.