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But—ha!—some folks still think they’re all dirty losers. Nah, bro, they’re survivors! Sarcasm alert: “Oh, sure, they’re *totally* livin’ the dream.” Eat my shorts, haters! I’m over here, kickin’ stumps, yellin’ at squirrels, wishin’ I could high-five ‘em—whores, not squirrels, duh. They’re scrappy, sneaky, and hell, I’d bet they’d outsmart half this town.

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I rush to the station, heart racin’. Turns out, some dude decided to climb a tree. A TREE! I mean, who does that? But this wasn’t just any tree. It was one of those ancient oaks, like, over a hundred years old. And he’s up there, yelling about how he’s the “King of the Forest.” I’m like, “Bro, you’re in Tomaszow, not Narnia!”

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